Did you forget how to speak Grunge, you lamestain? Refresher here.

All the hoopla about Soundgarden’s 20th anniversary reissue of “Superunknown,” coupled with their upcoming White River Amphitheater (that’s in Auburn y’all) and topped off with the news of an upcoming documentary has got the Northwest Music Scene feeling a little nostalgic for the early 1990s.

marc jacobs grunge styleIn the course of soothing that longing for days of dropped-D tuning past we stumbled upon this, a 1992 New York Times article describing the trend called Grunge. Although the article glosses over the impact of the music that fueled the phenomena, it does a wonderful job of detailing the fashion industries capitalization of the flannel, boots and knit cap uniform.

The article is most notable for the inclusion of the guide to “grunge speak.

“All subcultures speak in code; grunge is no exception. Megan Jasper, a 25-year-old sales representative at Caroline Records in Seattle, provided this lexicon of grunge speak, coming soon to a high school or mall near you:”

The list is perhaps one of the finest pranks of all time, however,made up by Megan Jasper, who actually worked for Sub Pop not Caroline. (she’s now the Sub Pop executive vice president!).

So here’s your refresher course cob knobbler. Rock on!

WACK SLACKS: Old ripped jeans

FUZZ: Heavy wool sweaters

PLATS: Platform shoes

KICKERS: Heavy boots

SWINGIN’ ON THE FLIPPITY-FLOP: Hanging out

BOUND-AND-HAGGED: Staying home on Friday or Saturday night

SCORE: Great

HARSH REALM: Bummer

COB NOBBLER: Loser

DISH: Desirable guy

BLOATED, BIG BAG OF BLOATATION: Drunk

LAMESTAIN: Uncool person

TOM-TOM CLUB: Uncool outsiders

ROCK ON: A happy goodbye

About Shawn Skager

Shawn Skager is just an everyday joe like you, who loves music and is lucky enough to be able to write about it. When he's not enjoying long walks on the beach, getting caught in the rain, pina coladas and cheesy 70s music by guys named Rupert, Shawn can usually be found in the Northwest Convergence Zone radio studio doing either the Northwest Music Scene radio show or the Hooligan Honky Tonk Radio Hour. And just for the record, Shawn believes that Rush's exclusion from the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame and Hank Williams Sr.'s exclusion from the Grand Ol' Opry are crimes against humanity.